Tennis Elbow

A gentleman, down there at the local CVS, you probably know who he is, is about to get hired

on as the newest General Manager. The last step in the hiring process is to take a urine test.

Well, he goes down to the clinic to give a urine sample, and they have this new computer that

can diagnose any problem, and very quickly too. So, he gives his urine sample to the doctor,

and the doctor pours the sample into the machine. There are clicking & buzzing noises and

lights flashing about, and then a ticket feeds out of the machine. The doctor reads it, “It says

here that you have tennis elbow.” The man disagrees and says, “I don’t have tennis elbow.

Your machine is wrong!” The doctor, knowing that this is all new technology, states, “Alright,

how about you come back tomorrow and we can give this another try?” The man agrees.

So, the man goes home and is insistent on really tricking this machine, because he thinks it’s a

bunch of bullshit. Ha, a machine telling him he has tennis elbow. He starts filling up a jar with

a concoction. He gathers tap water from the kitchen, urine samples from his wife and daughter,

and he puts a few drips of oil from his car, and then masturbates into the jar.

The next day, all proud of his concoction, he drives back to the clinic to give ‘his urine

sample’. He gives his urine sample to the doctor, and the doctor pours the sample into the

machine. There are clicking & buzzing noises and lights flashing about, and then a ticket feeds

out of the machine. The doctor reads it, “It says here that your tap water has lead in it, your

daughter is pregnant, your wife has gonorrhea, your car needs an oil change, and if you don’t

stop jerking off, you’re not going to cure that tennis elbow.”